“
None of this makes sense. It seems infinity is in both space and time. Where are you in that infinity? What are you? How can something exist? How can nothing exist? How can I perceive things? How can I feel things? It is all just absolutely absurd, beyond any comprehension. Answers do not exist. We are not discovering the truth (we just cannot), we are manufacturing it, to ease this dread caused by awareness.
”
i think i just thought of one of the best quotes in history: “The perversion is hidden under the deepest seas. That is why it is so powerful.”
to control a woman
to control others
having slaves
it is there,
hidden in us
cause that is the history we were taught of
everything remains what is observed
and it has its powers
forever
fuck
everything does fucking repeat
over and over
in the same way eventually
just different actors
and different stage
fuck
jesus will come back
hahahaha
“Emotions are fleeting. Remember that before enacting self-destructive behavior.”
“Think of biggest problems you have. Now, think about how your life would look like if you did not have them.”
“you make me alive. fantasies of you are so delicious. it is going to end badly. i do not care.”
The demon of sex precedes thoughts emerging and those thoughts being perceived i.e. those enchanting poetic love stories are created to justify the ID in order to satisfy the Super-Ego. The captain of the ship is invisible, hidden under the veil of fantasies such as love or friendship. Is it truly needed? One might say this truth would break the social norms. But, would it be bad? What if everyone peeled the onion until they saw what is inside the bulb? Where would it lead to? I believe it would lead to the actual true love.
In other words, drives are the initiators of the action and thought. They reward or punish us through feelings. Thoughts must match societal norms (that are internalized as well) to satisfy the Super-Ego. Think you love that person, miss them while listening to love songs and all of it makes you feel alive? Well, the drive of reproduction rewards you in this way so you continue being attached to the person you can reproduce with.
Are we just marionettes of the drives believing in a lie that we are free? Just the knowledge and clear awareness of it does not seem to lead to a long-term emancipation. Is it because there will always be a part in us that wants to believe in magic?
“Hope for love being real destroys evil.”
Can the pain of love be conquered? Destroyed? Or there is nothing but to feel it as long as it is felt? Is resistance futile? Should it even be pursued?
It hurts so much..
But is she the reason for that pain or the pain comes from not attaining what she represents? Desperate attempt to possess beauty. That failed once again. All for what? Is it because we appreciate beauty? No. It is an attempt to be God and to have subordinates. "Look at me! I possess this creature! I am superior! Bow to me!". You are better than this! Escape through seeing it clearly. You are not God. You are a mere beast. Beauty is not to be possessed, it is to be childishly appreciated.
It hurts so bad..
Another unfulfilled fantasy that I indulged in so greedily. Can we actually love? Are we trying to escape what we know we are through these fantasies and lies such as love?
We can truly love! It is possible. And I will never give up on it no matter what. No matter how much I have to endure, I will endure it. I will die believing in it. I will never give up on it. Amor fati! Bring it on, Satan. You can suck my dick. You are nothing compared to me.
“The ideology of modern times makes it a personal duty to enjoy oneself. That leads to people feeling anxious when they do not enjoy enough. Constant pleasure seeking and personal satisfaction becomes the ultimate goal.”
“Do good to others. Pay attention to them. Care. Be loyal. To every single person you meet. We are all here together in this nonsense. On a small blue spaceship travelling through space.”